Ranking Project Runway: Season 9, Ep. 8

On this week's episode of Project Runway, the designers have to work for clients. The clients are the husbands and boyfriends of their models for the week. First they work with just the men, then the women come in the screw up almost everyone's designs. In other words, it's the Nina challenge all over again, only with more color on the runway; more does not mean better. As always, here are the top 5 moments of the episode, plus personal ranking and commentary on the judges' decisions.

Oh Noes! Menswear!

Fake Out

The designers are cruelly tricked into thinking they're doing a random menswear challenge. Don't you think they should know better if they've ever watched the show? Menswear is either designed for a famous person or designed for someone they know. Surprise client challenges have always been restricted to women with a connecting gimmick--high school girls, divorcees, massive weight loss cases. Since no gimmick was announced, the Chicken Little reaction was uncalled for. You already had your unusual surprise client challenge with stilt walkers, designers; the producers aren't going to put you through it again.

What's a DD?

Oliver is pretending to be paralyzed by his design challenge this episode. First he goes off on how much he hates designing for fat men.

No Fat Dudes

Then he goes off on how his clothes only look good on professional models because any curves ruin his designs. That sounds like a personal problem. He knows he is digging himself into a huge hole, so he keeps adding statements like "not like that's bad in real life, but..." to every horrifying thing that comes out of his mouth.

No Busty Chicks

Then he gets to Mood where he proceeds to ask everyone what DD means. This is a fashion designer. He does not know what a cup size is. Tim refuses to encourage him, and the employee at Mood only repeats what everyone else said.

Clearly none of them watch RuPaul's Drag U. Lady Bunny's cup size system, activate!

So to answer your question, Oliver: slightly bigger than a nice pair of grapefruits, smaller than a pair of large watermelon.

Boobies!

Boobies!

Bert's client is obsessed with boobies. He'd have his wife walk around in a pair of pasties if NYC would allow it. And by NYC, I mean his wife who shoots down any design that shows off everything she has. Regardless, he does demonstrate motor-boating to the workroom and makes a fool of himself. If only he were Oliver's client.

PINK!!!1!

PINK!!!1!

Meanwhile, Bryce's client is obsessed with pink. Not just any pink: hot pink. Pepto Bismal pink. Party limo for girls under 8 pink. Bryce hates pink. Bryce bought a perfectly lovely shade of pink that he could have made a sweet little party dress out of but hates it. So he dyes his fabric full tilt Halloween wig color and then decides to try and hide it with color blocking. He blocks it with oatmeal. Tim does not approve. Then he sews a whole new dress. And by whole new dress, I mean he takes the same silhouette and seaming as his odd color blocked dress and adds pockets, straps, and cuffs until it's unrecognizable. The hot pink with the light pink would have worked on the color blocked version. Too bad he hated the light pink.

Stop Sewing!

Get OUT!

I haven't seen this happen very often on Project Runway before. Tim Gunn has to chase designers out of the workroom. Kimberly and Oliver are hand-stitching garments as they try to walk down the hallway to the runway. And they both wind up safe with unfinished clothing. Let that be a lesson to all future designers: dark non-shiny fabrics hide everything from Nina's pervasive eye.

Personal Ranking

Viktor is My Win

  1. Viktor: adorable street wear, great colors, fits perfectly, just the right proportions
  2. Anthony Ryan: color balance is throwing me off but at least it's well made
  3. Laura: looks messy on the bottom to me, don’t like the train or back slit
  4. Bert: hate the pattern, ill-fitting
  5. Anya: asymmetry is out of control
  6. Kimberly: kind of tacky, but well-made
  7. Joshua: boring and simple except for the rickrack on the neckline and back
  8. Bryce: construction issues, but the idea is good. Great color, back could use more fabric
  9. Oliver: does nothing for this model's figure, uneven seams and poorly fitted pants

Joshua's My Out

Judges' Ranking

Top:

  • Anya
  • Viktor

Winner: Joshua

Bottom

  • Bert
  • Anthony Ryan

Out: Bryce

Bryce is Out

Do I think the judges made the right decisions? Yes on the elimination, no on the winner. I hated Joshua's dress. He won because he edited himself. Meanwhile, in season 2, Heidi was sent home for making the exact same dress with the same kind of lace details in white before the competition officially began. Have we dropped that far down in quality that outfits that would stop someone from competing are worthy of the win? I hope not.

Thoughts? Sound off below.

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