What You Missed: RuPaul's Drag Race: Season 3, Ep. 13

RuPaul hits out of the park with the annual Drag Ball episode. This year's theme is money. First, the girls are challenged to sell RuRu something out of their personal drag closet on RuVC.

RuVC: The Premiere Drag Shopping Network

Raja sold her gaff (a special device for holding the candy in place, if you will) as a modern day smelling salt dressed as a busted librarian straight out of Pleasantville.

Perks you right up!

Yara won the mini challenge prize of $1,000,000. Make that RuDollars. What do you think of that, Miss Yara?

What Ha-Happened?

What Happened? You just gut pranked by RuPaul as she introduced the main challenge. The girls must complete three runway ready looks themed on money. They are: bikinis using gold coin embellishment for a dance number, after 5PM cocktail party dresses in gold fabric, and evening gowns made entirely out of RuDollar Bills that scream money.

The Dance number was super cool, even if Raja and Manila didn't do any of the steps right. Just look at this Golden Age presentation of RuCoins to the judges.

The category is Swimsuit Body Beautiful

I think the judges were smoking something before panel because they went the exact opposite of how I did. I thought Yara and Alexis were the top queens and Raja and Manila the clear losers for skirting by the challenge. Does Manila's admittedly awesome dress for a post 5AM cocktail party merit a win when she hid the money in her evening gown and only wore gold coin jewelry in her swimsuit? I think not.

Disco Chic...again

Yara, the poor thing, got played for a fool by the judges. How does this cocktail dress and this evening gown

Yara WorkYara Work Again

lead to bottom two? Those were the best dresses on the runway and Yara sold them as hard as Raja. If the challenge is to have a dress scream money, it better literally be screaming money in a drag contest. Yara, and to a lesser extent Alexis, followed the challenge prompts and were up for elimination.

My Yara would have won the Lip Sync For Your Life if she didn't implode on the runway.

At first she was like,

Eating Alexis Alive

And then she was like,

Girl, Turn It Out

And now she was like

Oh No, My Yara, Don't Cry

So my queen is out of the race...again. I hope Yara is ok because she completely lost it there. That was a full-on nervous breakdown. Even in the Untucked, RuPaul stressed that Alexis only moved on because Yara did not finish the Lip Sync For Your Life. RuPaul wanted Yara to win the whole thing but the other judges never warmed to her dark ice queen look. I'll just blame it all on Santino even though he wasn't there this week.

Next week is a clip show. I hate clip shows. I'll just bring you highlights from the whole season of Untucked. From Phoenix reading Stacy Lane Matthews to Yara shutting down backstage, no highlight or lowlight we be left unexposed. Except I'm placing a moratorium on Carmen nudity. I will censor accordingly. I'm thinking unicorns...

Listen: Danger Mouse and Daniele Luppi's "Two Against One"/"Black"

Why We Watch: Real Housewives of [Any City] (Bravo)